Has your idea of what makes a good friend changed as you’ve gotten older?

Growing up, I had a rather simple understanding of what made someone a good friend. I thought it was about being available, spending time together, having endless conversations, sharing secrets, showing up for important occasions and generally being there for each other and while all of these things are true, I’ve come to realize that friendship requires a lot more than proximity and shared experiences.

As I’ve grown older, I’ve realised that true friendships are built on honesty, consistency, mutual respect and emotional maturity. They’re characterised by the ability to disagree without disrespecting each other and celebrate each other’s successes without feeling competitive. We encourage growth without feeling threatened, call each other out when necessary and have difficult conversations without turning them into unnecessary drama.

I understand that we might not speak every day or see each other as often as we’d like but the love and respect remain strong. After all, people have their own lives and responsibilities.

Most importantly, friendship means being the same kind of friend you want others to be to you because friendship isn’t just about finding good people, it’s also about becoming one.